“If you keep making that face, it will freeze like that.”
“If you swallow too many watermelon seeds, one may grow inside you!”
These are a couple of the things that we heard from our mothers. These little nuggets of sarcasm. Parental lessons that we had no idea that we would use when we, ourselves, became mothers!
Only Trollops Shave Above the Knee: The Crazy, Brilliant, and Unforgettable Lessons We’ve Learned from Our Mothers is officially on the market today and you can get a copy of your very own.
This hilariously, relatable anthology comes from the editor of The Mother Of All Meltdowns and a slew of great writers who are sharing their own lessons learned with us!
My own mother’s advice does echo in my head from time to time, but the one that I can remember the most and the one that makes me laugh the most is her “beware what you consume”speech.
“As a young woman, you have to beware what you consume. Be wary of when and what you eat and drink. Don’t eat garlic or asparagus before a date because your breath and pee will smell. Don’t order dessert if you eat out because you will seem to expect too much. Always watch your drink, so nothing can be slipped into it and don’t drink booze because it’ll just make you a loosey-goosey!”
Yeah, my mom was pretty straight and to the point. It’s a good thing I didn’t date too much!
Trust me, grab a copy of Only Trollops Shave Above The Knee because their stories are a lot funnier than mine, but you will completely understand all of them!